We live in a mobile society. We have cars, trains, motorcycles, buses. It is rare to go a day without seeing something drive by. For a lot of people, it is rare to go a day without driving something.
Driving is so much a part of our adult lives that it is often taken for granted. Yet how many times have you clenched your teeth or yelled out a swear word or yes, given some one the finger because of how they drove?
Driving etiquette is as important as any other kind of etiquette.
The obvious: Avoid road rage. Take several deep breathes; count to 10. Do what you need to do to calm down. What ever it takes just do not engage with other operators. I do not know of a single good thing that has come from confronting another driver.
You could try telling yourself that none of this will matter in five years. Some people find that calming. If not, try to find what does let you get past it and let it go. Maybe it is good music. For me, I shake my head at them and have an imaginary conversation where I say things like, "Pick a lane, sweetie."
Follow the rules of the road. Do not take sudden u-turns in front of people with no warning. Use your turn signal. Drive on your side of the road. Obey stop signs and yields.
The less obvious: Be considerate of those around you. If you are on the main road with the right away but a lot of people are trying to merge in, follow the one of them, one of us rule. Let one car go ahead of you. This helps move the traffic along and demonstrates courtesy to both the drivers trying to merge and the ones stuck behind you. Yes, you have the right away but you also have the chance to be courteous.
If everyone demonstrated courtesy, we would have less traffic jams and more time out of our vehicles. It's worth a try.
Sunday, May 25, 2014
Sunday, May 18, 2014
20 Easy Ways To Annoy Other People
1. Interrupt someone when they are speaking.
2. Be late for an engagement without calling.
3. Ignore someone.
4. Talk loudly on your phone in a public place.
5.Cut someone off in traffic.
6. Play your music loudly when your neighbors are trying to sleep.
7. Chew with your mouth open.
8. Correct other people in public.
9. Park across multiple parking spaces.
10. Throw trash in some one's yard or out of your car window.
11. Stand in some one's personal space.
12. Blow cigarette smoke into some one's face.
13. Break your promises.
14. Leave a mess.
15. Take up multiple seats on the bus or train.
16. Talk during the movie.
17. Let your children run through the store screaming.
18. Be a poor sport if you lose.
19. Use the phrase, "Don't you know who I am?".
20. Cause a scene.
2. Be late for an engagement without calling.
3. Ignore someone.
4. Talk loudly on your phone in a public place.
5.Cut someone off in traffic.
6. Play your music loudly when your neighbors are trying to sleep.
7. Chew with your mouth open.
8. Correct other people in public.
9. Park across multiple parking spaces.
10. Throw trash in some one's yard or out of your car window.
11. Stand in some one's personal space.
12. Blow cigarette smoke into some one's face.
13. Break your promises.
14. Leave a mess.
15. Take up multiple seats on the bus or train.
16. Talk during the movie.
17. Let your children run through the store screaming.
18. Be a poor sport if you lose.
19. Use the phrase, "Don't you know who I am?".
20. Cause a scene.
Sunday, May 11, 2014
Mother's Day
Today is Mother's Day. Here are a few things to keep in mind for the holiday.
If you are close enough, you should make every effort to see your mother today. That edict includes step mothers and foster mothers as well. It is not just biology that makes a parent.
If you are not close enough to see her, make sure you call to say Happy Mother's Day. For those farther away, send a card and/or a present. Hopefully, you have already sent it at this point. If not, get it out to her tomorrow but make sure you call her today.
Try not to put one mother ahead of another. Your mother should not always get first pick of plans nor should your spouse or partner's. Alternate years if you need to, so that your mother gets first preference even years and theirs, odd years.
If you have small children, do not forget the mother of your children. It is your responsibility to make sure she gets a proper Mother's Day until the children are old enough to do it themselves.
Try not to always put your mother ahead of the mother of your children as well. Try the alternating years with alternating days. Your wife gets Mother's Day one year while your mother gets taken out on Saturday instead and the next year you alternate. This may not be necessary but make sure you know how the mother of your children feels about always tagging along on your mother's day before you decide.
Really the proper etiquette for today is gratitude. Find the good in your relationship--even if you have a strained one--and try to make sure you recognize your mother on Mother's Day. If nothing else, they make greeting cards for all relationships. You may have spend a little time finding the right one but you will find it. Hopefully you have a wonderful relationship with your mother and this is all just frosting but if not, at least be cordial. As always, etiquette asks for civility if you can not be friendly.
If you are close enough, you should make every effort to see your mother today. That edict includes step mothers and foster mothers as well. It is not just biology that makes a parent.
If you are not close enough to see her, make sure you call to say Happy Mother's Day. For those farther away, send a card and/or a present. Hopefully, you have already sent it at this point. If not, get it out to her tomorrow but make sure you call her today.
Try not to put one mother ahead of another. Your mother should not always get first pick of plans nor should your spouse or partner's. Alternate years if you need to, so that your mother gets first preference even years and theirs, odd years.
If you have small children, do not forget the mother of your children. It is your responsibility to make sure she gets a proper Mother's Day until the children are old enough to do it themselves.
Try not to always put your mother ahead of the mother of your children as well. Try the alternating years with alternating days. Your wife gets Mother's Day one year while your mother gets taken out on Saturday instead and the next year you alternate. This may not be necessary but make sure you know how the mother of your children feels about always tagging along on your mother's day before you decide.
Really the proper etiquette for today is gratitude. Find the good in your relationship--even if you have a strained one--and try to make sure you recognize your mother on Mother's Day. If nothing else, they make greeting cards for all relationships. You may have spend a little time finding the right one but you will find it. Hopefully you have a wonderful relationship with your mother and this is all just frosting but if not, at least be cordial. As always, etiquette asks for civility if you can not be friendly.
Sunday, May 4, 2014
Book Borrowing Etiquette
I love to read. I regularly borrow books from the library and occasionally from friends. I sometimes lend out books as well. Unfortunately loaning out books can be a dangerous thing to do. Dangerous to the book and to the friendship. If someone borrows your book and returns it in poor condition or does not return it at all, this can damage the friendship.
So if you are a book borrower, whether it be from the library, from a friend or from a coworker, here are some things to keep in mind.
Treat the book better than if it was yours. I have on a couple of occasions hated a book so much that I threw it across the room. This was only when the book was my own property and it was not in an area to actually hit anything. I would never throw a library book or a borrowed one.
You should never write in a book that you have not yourself purchased or been given as a gift. This includes underlining things or taking notes in the margins. Do not dog ear the pages. I often get library books home and find the tips of pages tucked under. This is damaging to the book and distracting to the next reader. Try taking notes or using those little sticky note tabs or even just sticking a piece of paper in to mark the page.
Do not eat or drink around a book that is not yours. It is easy to drip even if you are careful. How many times have you looked down and realized you have dripped food on your shirt or pants? Drips happen. Keep them away from other people's books.
Do not read a borrowed book in the tub. I am a big fan of taking a paperback into the tub and soaking while I read. I would never do this with someone else's book. Water splashes and on rare occasions, books have been known to fall into people's tubs.
Do not re-lend the book. A loan to you is not a blank check to do as you please. By all means, recommend the book to someone but do not offer to loan that which is not yours.
Be careful of how you transport or carry a borrowed book. It is easy to cram it into a purse that already holds too much and not think about potential damage.
Most importantly, return the book in a timely fashion. A loan is not an indefinite thing. You should read the book promptly and return it promptly. This is the number one complaint of the book lenders that I know. I personally loaned a book to someone last summer and have yet to see it this spring. Do not be that person.
And the final etiquette rule, if you do damage a book you have borrowed, you need to purchase a replacement. You should do this immediately and without having to be asked. When you borrowed it, you accepted the responsibility for that book. If you are not willing to replace it, then think twice about borrowing it. Etiquette is not a forgiving thing and your friend may not be either if you ruin their book and expect them to pay for it.
So if you are a book borrower, whether it be from the library, from a friend or from a coworker, here are some things to keep in mind.
Treat the book better than if it was yours. I have on a couple of occasions hated a book so much that I threw it across the room. This was only when the book was my own property and it was not in an area to actually hit anything. I would never throw a library book or a borrowed one.
You should never write in a book that you have not yourself purchased or been given as a gift. This includes underlining things or taking notes in the margins. Do not dog ear the pages. I often get library books home and find the tips of pages tucked under. This is damaging to the book and distracting to the next reader. Try taking notes or using those little sticky note tabs or even just sticking a piece of paper in to mark the page.
Do not eat or drink around a book that is not yours. It is easy to drip even if you are careful. How many times have you looked down and realized you have dripped food on your shirt or pants? Drips happen. Keep them away from other people's books.
Do not read a borrowed book in the tub. I am a big fan of taking a paperback into the tub and soaking while I read. I would never do this with someone else's book. Water splashes and on rare occasions, books have been known to fall into people's tubs.
Do not re-lend the book. A loan to you is not a blank check to do as you please. By all means, recommend the book to someone but do not offer to loan that which is not yours.
Be careful of how you transport or carry a borrowed book. It is easy to cram it into a purse that already holds too much and not think about potential damage.
Most importantly, return the book in a timely fashion. A loan is not an indefinite thing. You should read the book promptly and return it promptly. This is the number one complaint of the book lenders that I know. I personally loaned a book to someone last summer and have yet to see it this spring. Do not be that person.
And the final etiquette rule, if you do damage a book you have borrowed, you need to purchase a replacement. You should do this immediately and without having to be asked. When you borrowed it, you accepted the responsibility for that book. If you are not willing to replace it, then think twice about borrowing it. Etiquette is not a forgiving thing and your friend may not be either if you ruin their book and expect them to pay for it.
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