There is an old question. Would you rather be right or be happy? For some people, there is no difference. To them, accuracy or in some cases superiority, is more important. In many cases, proper etiquette means rising above these things.
This does not mean being a pushover. Rules of etiquette often give you a chillingly polite way to respond. (If you do not believe me, check out Miss Manners columns sometime.) What they do not do, is let you be rude back. For instance, if someone is rude to you on the phone, you do not yell back at them. Etiquette means being polite even when others are not.
Good manners mean saying please even to family or friends that you have known for years. It does not mean if another adult fails to say please, that you get to correct them in public. It is something that should either be brought up in private or ignored. This is not being a pushover. Ultimately, the role of etiquette is to make life smoother all around. It exists to keep conflicts from exploding into full out wars.
If someone tries to start a disagreement, maintain a polite and low voiced response. Do not let it escalate into an argument, especially whenever you are in a group such as a holiday meal. This does not make you a coward, it makes you the wiser, better person in that moment.
If someone is in a bad mood, you can excuse yourself from the situation. You do not have to react back in anger. I know this can be difficult at times; I am guilty myself of it on occasion. However, everyone will be happier--especially in your romantic or family relationships--if you can take a step back and decide if this is a simple disagreement before reacting as if it is a big one. Would you rather have a happy home life or know that you had the last word? The rules of etiquette and your own mental health would give the same answer.
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