Sometimes when you are at a dinner party or out to eat with a large group, you find yourself reaching across someone and grabbing that roll from the bread basket. It seems so much simpler than getting their attention, asking them to pass the basket. Then you wait while they pass it, take the basket, pick your piece of bread, hand it back. They put the basket back down and you say thank you. It all seems so complicated. So much simpler to just reach across and take it, right? I'm afraid not.
Most people do not like others in their personal space. Having someone--even someone they know well--lean across them is aggravating. Good manners say, never reach across anyone. Always ask them to pass the item, please. Thank you. As with most rules of good etiquette, the idea is to offend as few people as possible. Staying out of their personal space is the best way to do this.
Have you ever been sitting next to someone who just keeps leaning a little into your space? Maybe it's not a big deal the first time or even the second. By the end of the evening you just want to elbow them in the side. (Please don't.) This is exactly the person you should avoid becoming (and maybe sitting beside if you can help it).
It is often the small things that set us up to be the most aggravated. Proper etiquette, also known as good manners, can help us avoid that.
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